How to cure road rage (or any type of rage)

Send them to baking class. Make the offenders bake their own bread.

This, my friend, is the ultimate lesson in patience. There is NOTHING you can do to make bread rise faster or cakes bake better. You have to follow the instructions, let things do their own thing and relax.

This I learnt on Friday when I took up my own challenge and baked my own challah, following Leslie’s Yummy Challah Recipe. Two things you should know about me first:

  1. I have not been blessed with patience. When I drive alone, I yell a lot. I mutter when walking behind slow people on the sidewalk. I try to curb my impatience but alas, my father has a lot to answer for.
  2. In the past, when I’ve tried to bake, I’ve screwed it up and never gone back. For the past 5 years, unless it was pre-mixed-just-add-water-and-an-egg, I wasn’t baking it.

So Friday, I got home from work and decided that it was Time. I got all the ingredients together, read the recipe (already printed out) and got to it. I mixed and I poured. I kneaded the dough til it needed no more. I covered the bowl and I left it to rise. Leslie said 1-2 hours.

Those were the longest hours of my week. I checked the bowl incessantly. I fretted that I should have added more flour. I fretted that it wasn’t rising. I found a million reasons to wander past the Bowl. I agonised that my bread was a flop and I should just give up.

It rose. I braided it and I baked it. And it was good. I tad salty (my bad – I added salted butter instead of unsalted) but oh so good.

But nothing I did made it so. The bread rose in its own sweet time. It baked in its own sweet time. All I did was combine the ingredients.

So, any police officers and judges out there – you want to teach road ragers a lesson? Send them to baking class.


6 thoughts on “How to cure road rage (or any type of rage)

  1. *shamelessly ganks the recipe*

    Oh, I ADORE Challah bread. Even if I can’t pronounce it. Love love love.

    *sniffs* Is that the smell of me trying to bake bread? You bet your sweet bippy it is!

    It’s OH SO GOOD I tell ‘ya. I’d make it a little sweeter next time, but that’s just me but watch, you’ll make it and it will DISAPPEAR into bellies faster than you can blink!

  2. Oh! I forgot to get back to you with regards to the steel-cut oatmeal!

    Bear in mind, I’m not a fan of oatmeal. So my descriptions probably sound like I’m not a fan of oatmeal.

    Taste is exactly the same, as far as I can tell.

    Take the texture of your normal oatmeal. Gloopy, with flakes of less-gloopy.

    The texture of the steel-cut oatmeal is nearly identical, but instead of flakes of less-gloopy, you get sort of rice-type less-gloopy bits.

    Not difficult to make ahead of time at all, and easily saved for future breakfasts.

    Mr. Ninja prefers his with buttermilk, butter, and a wee bit of maple syrup.

  3. Okay…I should take a bread baking class – probably try to cheat and use a bread making machine though! Hehehe

    Boo to the breadmaking cheat! Although I did use to love my parents’ breadmaker… but seriously, breadmaking is a great patience lesson. And a yummy one too!

  4. I’ll step up to both teach the chhhhhh-sound (trying to get my Tornado to do that and roll her r’s is hours of comedygold) & to be the Jew Who Also Makes Sans Breadmaker.

    Watchout friday night!


  5. oh my gosh this made my day!! I, also, am guilty of wandering by the bowl and looking to see if the dough has ballooned appropriately. Those ARE two loooong hours! But so worth it in the end and, yes, ultimately very calming.

    So glad yout tried it 😉

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