Congrats! Now make yourself better

I’ve begun my foray into the big wide world of BaB – Being a Bride and let me say, nobody told me how frigging scary this place is.

You know those girls who planned out their weddings from the age of 5? The ones who stop to look at engagement rings and wedding dresses at any time and who know exactly what they want? The ones who can break down an engagement ring to carat and cut and setting in under 2 minutes?

Yeah, not me.

I’ve never stopped to look at wedding dresses just because. I had no idea about rings and carats and cut. I still don’t. I bought my first wedding magazines on the weekend and I changed my status on facebook. Which brings me to the topic:

Did you know that, as a bride-to-be, your primary concern is not about having a happy marriage or a fun celebration at the wedding – it’s about the size of your thighs! Silly me, I thought because I’d found happiness and a guy who loves me for who I am and what I look like, I could be happy. Silly, silly me.

No, according to every ad I see on facebook (I’ve recently changed computers and haven’t installed all my adblockers yet), I should be losing weight, toning up my trouble spots, clearing my skin and generally, improving myself immediately. I mean, I obviously conned him into proposing somehow but now I gotta make myself over STAT so he doesn’t run screaming from the altar.

It enough to turn anyone into a bumbling fool, mumbling about diets and bootcamps and facial treatments. I can only hope that I’m strong enough to resist. One thing is for sure: I won’t be making my bridesmaids go through this!


5 thoughts on “Congrats! Now make yourself better

  1. hahaha!! My mantra for planning a wedding was this: “If I’m married at the end of my wedding day, it was a successful wedding.”

    Who cares about the cake/flowers/linens/size of the napkin rings?!

    If, at the end of the day, you’re married–all is well! πŸ™‚

    • You mean you DIDN’T obsess about the colour and placement of the party favours? OMG!


      I’m with you on this – since when is this the pinnacle of our lives? If I’m married to my man, then it’s a perfect day

  2. I too agree, but I know my thighs need to get a bit smaller before the day,, otherwise it will be my child bearing hips that people will be talking about πŸ™‚
    Don’t you change a thing! I think the previous comments are spot on. As long as we are married at the end of the day, that is all that counts.

    Why don’t we make double sure and do a quick, secret Vegas wedding a few months before? That way,, no pressure to even get the marriage bit right on the day πŸ™‚

    • You do realise that BOTH sides of the family (which, by your calculation, involves a total of SIX parents) would kill us?

      Not worth it in my book.

      That said, ask me again in a few months, I may feel different!

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