I’ve been too ashamed to blog. I’ve fallen off the wagon, strayed off course and gained weight, lost muscle and abandoned all motivation.
It seemed wrong to be blogging when I was focused on my uni course (Masters of Creative Writing, Publishing and Editing) and work and sleeping and not working out at all. Add to that a lack of energy from doing too much and eating badly and all I felt was guilt.
But now I’ve had a shock to the system.
An old friend of mine lost her mother to cancer on Monday.
A family friend of ours went to the doctor yesterday with a killer migraine and is now undergoing surgery for a large brain tumour and an aneurysm. She’s 31, like me. Married, like me. She’s healthy – she eats well and she exercises. She has 2 young kids under 5 and she’s beautiful and amazing. And when my mother called me last night to tell me the news, I cried. I sobbed. Not because I’m particularly close to her but because she could be me. This strikes anyone, anywhere. There’s nothing you do to bring it on. That terrifies me.
All I could think about last night was that she will probably die from this and her young husband will be left bringing up 2 adorable kids without his soulmate.
And it made me think that I need to shake up my priorities. Being healthy is more than just running around a track. It’s a state of mind. For me, having a healthy lifestyle is about prioritising my family, my friends, myself. It’s exercising for the love of it. Eating well for pleasure and for health. Being in the moment. And if that sometimes means taking time to cuddle on the couch and watch movies with my Boy, then that’s being healthy for me.
Please pray for my friend. She needs all your good thoughts.